Thursday, August 2, 2012

In which I make a meager metaphor


It will come as a surprise to absolutely no one ever that this summer has been busy. Busy in the best of ways - new experiences, new people, new challenges. I have felt more in my element at times than I have in ages: healthy, energized, inspired and in awe of the world around me. The transition to life in LA was relatively seamless - I have dear friends here, I walked into an incredible fellowship right away and I landed in the most beautiful, vista-enshrouded home with amiable housemates and a mattress that didn't send my back into spasms (as moves often do). Perhaps most importantly, I have been living right next to downtown (where my office is) so of all the places in the world, LA has provided the easiest commute I've just about ever had.

Partially as a result of said absent commute, I haven't got my bearings yet with the freeways. Though I've talked "big talk" about relignquishing my reliance on Google Maps, I continue to enter my destination point each time I get in the car, and attempt to use it to navigate as I drive. Somehow, this tool is proving less and less helpful. In the last day I've missed approximately 7 exits (no exageration) and often found myself headed directly out of town as I attempt to get to the center of it.

At each of these moments, when I've managed to pry my eyes away from the road directly ahead or the tiny map I'm clinging to, I can often see where I'm meant to be going quite clearly (hard to miss a looming metropolis as it fills your left-hand window). When I manage to glance up and gather my bearings from the utterly obvious markers (ocean/mountains/city), I'm reminded that I know this place better than it feels like I do. I've also been here for long enough to have a sense of where I am the vast majority of the time - so why is it so hard to let go of the prescribed directions and trust my intuition?

ARE YOU GETTING MY METAPHOR!?!

Every glorious experience these days seems to remind me why letting go of the highlighted path in favor of one's growing knowledge of self, desires and strengths is the ONLY way to get where you actually need to be. I've spent over an hour in the last two days (days that started early on little sleep and ended late - in short, days in which I had no time or energy to spare) trying to follow prescribed paths that ultimately led me away from where I was going. These detours increased my frustration and fatigue while delaying the nourishment and rest that awaited me at home. Had I looked up (driving) or looked inward (life in general), I probably would have arrived much sooner and saved myself quite a bit of money (driving) and anxiety (life in general).

So there it is: a Google Maps take on GETTING THERE, whether by way of a Subaru station-wagon or, in the larger context, by those tugs of intuition that result from doing the work/exploration/growing that teach you what path you're on. Because really, there's no short cut to get where you're going - but you certainly don't have to drive in circles just for the hell of it.